autisticalice: (happiness; katy)
 So this is my finished chapter. I did change a lot and it's not the same as the teaser. I hope it is a little better but it probably isn't. I know it's possibly a better improvement though.

Being the new girl in school started out like any other normal day at school. It was early September on a muggy fall day in Seattle as storm clouds rolled through the gray sky. I gulped as I looked up, hoping it wouldn’t make any rumbling sounds. I watched some of the girls mingle with one another when they saw me staring at them.

I looked away immediately before starting anything with them on my first day here. I wanted to make a good impression at school, despite not knowing how to make any friends. I knew I had to try so I approached the girls with my usually shy smile as I thought of what I could say.

“Did you know the cheetah is fastest animal in the world?” I said out of the blue with a smile.

“Uh… we aren’t talking about Cheetahs.” one of the girls raised her eyebrow at me as I frowned and immediately looked away. “In fact we were just talking about the cute boy over there.” she glanced at the boy reading under a tree with messy black hair, jeans and a t-shirt.

“I don’t think he’s very cute…” I blurted as the three girls glared at me like I was some alien.

“What planet are you from, freak?” the girls laughed as they looked at me and walked away. “I mean who the hell dressed you this morning, by the way, a clown?” she laughed again as she looked down at my denim capris, red petticoat skirt and black hooded shirt with my black skateboard shoes.

“What’s wrong with the way I look?” I frowned, not understanding why it was a big deal.

“Because you look more like a thrift shop got sick and threw up all over you!” another girl teased as I looked at what they were wearing compared to my outfit.

These girls looked like perfect barbie dolls with their latest jeans and trendy matching tops. I guess I didn’t quite understand the real logic for following trends and being someone you aren’t. It wasn’t exactly the impression I wanted to make on my first day here at Ridgeway.

“We don’t befriend losers like you, especially with such ridiculous fashion.” the third girl laughed as I looked down to the ground shyly, wondering what I did wrong.

“Yeah. No one cares about your stupid cheetah either!” the girls laughed at me as they walked away to go after the boy under the tree.

I stood there as the odd one out, just like I always ended up being. I was never going to make friends because it didn’t see to matter how hard I tried when all I did was fail. I sighed as I sat back down at the table where I was before and put my head down. There were still a few minutes left before school started.

I wish I didn’t have such a hard time making friends… I looked up at the sky again when I heard it rumble, causing me to cover my ears.

I hated thunder as much as I did all other loud sounds that usually made me do this. I knew the rain was going to fall soon but as soon as it did, the first bell finally rang. I rushed to my class, using my backpack as an umbrella from the rain.

The mean girls I tried to be friends with before, saw me and pushed me down as they laughed and walked away. I got into class which happened to be my worst subject, and that was Math. I entered the classroom late as the teacher turned to me sneaking into my seat.

“You’re late.” she replied as she looked at me with a scowl. “I’m giving you detention for being tardy. Any student who is late to my class gets detention, without exception!” she handed me a detention slip as I stared at it and gave her a frown.

“But… but I can’t get detention…” I looked at her and frowned, trying to hold back my tears. “My sister always picks me up after school and detention disrupts that for me!” I shook my head and tried to reason with her but she made her decision final.

I couldn’t let my routine be ruined by going to detention. It didn’t seem right to me that it had to be disrupted because I just couldn’t wrap my mind around the idea. There was no way of convincing her those reasons without sounding like I just wanted to have special treatment.

This day is turning out to be a real bust… I told myself as I slumped down on my seat, letting the tears run down my cheeks.

I was seconds away from a complete outburst, even as I tried so hard to remain calm. I wanted so badly to make a good impression but my mind felt like it was going to explode. There was no stopping what was about to happen in that very moment, and nothing could be worse than total humiliation.

My desk flipped over with a thud as I screamed and rocked myself while covering my ears. The teacher ordered her students to leave the classroom only to call security on me. I was in such a heavy panic of rocking and sobbing that my body had gone completely numb, making it impossible to speak a word.

“Please don’t make our job difficult.” one of the security guards said as I yanked my arm from him.

I screamed louder as I shoved them off and ran down the hallway, into the girls bathroom. I locked the stall and sat down on the tile floor as I continued rocking and covering my ears. I wasn’t sure what I was going to do since my mind was in shock from what was happening.

“I hate myself. I hate myself. I’m a total freak. I hate myself.” I repeated as the tears streamed down my cheeks while I continued rocking myself back and forth.

Every school I attended ignored IEPs and treated me like I didn’t have a disability. I wasn’t taken seriously and each time there were always hard consequences that would ensue. It wasn’t long until I started to feel bad for my actions so after I slowly calmed down, I came out of the bathroom and followed the security guards to the principal’s office.

“Do you mind telling me what caused this little outburst?” he asked me as I looked around the room without saying a single word to him.

I guess I wasn’t entirely sure how to explain myself, even as much as I tried to find the answer. My mind was still racing from the sudden outburst I experienced over a lousy detention I had received. I knew he was expecting me to have some big reason for acting out immaturely in class.

“I got angry.” I looked down at my fingers while fidgeting and rocking calmly.

“Tell me what made you so angry, Jade.” he said in the most calm voice I had ever heard.

It actually made it impossible for me to read his expression with such a weird calming tone for the actions I took. I could have handled the situation better but I really hadn’t known any better. I looked at him briefly until glancing around the room at his certificates on the wall behind him.

“I got detention and I didn’t think it was fair. My sister always picks me up after school.” I told him as I looked at him again, only to look away again. “It wasn’t fair because things have to always be the same.” I added as he nodded at what I had said.

“Since you’re new here, I won’t take any action to punish you. I understand that things are different for you because of your disability but don’t expect any special treatment in the future if this happens again.” he told me as I nodded and gave a sigh.

I could tell this day was going to turn into a total disaster. I only hoped that nothing else would go wrong or that would be yet another outburst waiting to happen. I was given a pass to my second class as I headed that way in the calmest way possible.

What more could go wrong? 

I hope you do like it. D:
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autisticalice: (Default)

September 2015

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